I’ve always looked at happiness as a state of mind. If you want to be happy…you will be.

If you want to be unhappy…you will be
.-= Roschelle´s last blog ..Is the basement blogger on the verge of extinction =-.

Wasn’t it John Lennon who said happiness is a warm gun? Look where it got him.

Yeah he saw it on a gun magazine and thought it was cool so he wrote the song. I’m pretty sure he would have been happier if the warm gun had been in his hand, but hey at least he’ll never have to say he’s so sorry.

Too simplistic for me Roschelle, my mind apparently doesn’t work like yours. I tell it to be happy and there’s no reason it shouldn’t be, but damned if it follows my instructions. I am unipolar by the way.

Hi Jude dear

It’s rather interesting that you wrote about happiness maybe is an illusion, as lately I’ve been struggling with that too. Though I’ve been practicing positive thinking and so forth, lately I’m finding it a bit challenging. Perhaps I’m just feeling overwhelmed with things right now. I do prefer the more positive mental activity though and feel that my happiness would be achieve by feeling content.
.-= Lea´s last blog ..The Bible Has Codes? =-.

Hey Lea((((((((big hug))))))) where have you been? I see you changed your blog url or at least when I went to it, it wasn’t there. I tried to find you. I’ll have to add this one to my links hopefully I wont lose you again. It’s so funny you turned up today because I was thinking hard about you and was praying you were okay. I so wish good vibes and things for you.

my fav quote has always beeb “most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be” so true, after all happiness is merely a state of mind
.-= ann´s last blog ..MOOODY =-.

LOL Ann that’s only a quote not a fact, but if it’s true for you then it’s a fact and I know you’ll be happy all your life.

I think a utopian world would be pretty depressing. I kind of like a world that has occasional zits. I’m pretty happy with good days and bad ones. Nothing wrong with lousy days. They make the good ones really worth it.
.-= grayspirit´s last blog ..Life Stages of Retirement: Bliss, Cravings, and Self-Discovery =-.

No Lancaster this weekend..happiness in the family first. Hubby’s back.. no good for walking and daughter..well let’s say, she doesn’t want to be with us. So to not be upset or disappointing I decided to let daughter go to friend for the night and hubby and me will find something that does not require too much walking. Lancaster will only see you guys and Me..well later maybe.
.-= AuntieE´s last blog ..My Favorite Song Weekend. =-.

Happiness is a state of mind in relative term.

Happiness is the state of mind that stands opposite the state of mind of unhappiness. Happiness never stays still, but it always stays opposite unhappiness.

Happiness is not absolute, nor an illusion.

Have a happy weekend!
.-= bj´s last blog ..52! =-.

It’s all relative. What makes me happy isn’t what makes you happy. And we have to lower our standards of what makes us happy in order to achieve it more in life. Plus there are so many other factors that affect our attitude. Just wanting to be happy doesn’t make it so.
.-= Lin´s last blog ..Xenon – 1, Lin – 0 =-.

Happiness is something that comes from within and life is so much better when you have it. If you want to be happy you will be, it is as simple as that.
.-= William Wallace´s last blog ..Nottign Hill7 =-.

I think that happiness is something that needs to be practiced. I try to show people the tools for uncovering happiness, (I believe that happiness is already inside us all, we just need to learn to ignite it). Once ignited, it is very important to continually practice being happy everyday.

It is my mission to launch a program where we can all do that together!

Blessings,
Ricky
.-= Ricky Powell´s last blog ..Aug 9, ten ways to fill up on happiness =-.

As one door closes, another opens…

Perhaps your struggle is more of defining happiness than it is of feeling it.
.-= Theresa´s last blog ..A Dilemma of Normalcy =-.

Everyone wants happiness and I think it depends largely on your own mental attitude. We often hear the phrase “the pursuit of happiness” but if you pursue happiness you’ll never find it. It was Martha Washington who said “The greatest part of our happiness depends on our dispositions, not our circumstances.”

As the song says “don’t worry, be happy!”

Cheers!
.-= Robin´s last blog ..The Best Laid Plans.. =-.

You’re right Theresa, I have felt happiness during periods of my life and have even felt elation at certain times, but I can count those times on one hand. Maybe because I am unipolar I just don’t feel the way normal people do. My Son was the biggest high of my life and without him maybe it’s a survivor syndrome because I know it should have been me instead of him which makes me profoundly sad.

I’m sorry, I missed what happened to your son?
.-= Ricky Powell´s last blog ..Aug 9, ten ways to fill up on happiness =-.

Ricky, my Son died in December at 39 from cancer and it’s been the most difficult period of my life. He had a baby Son at the same time he was being diagnosed. He was so afraid he wouldn’t get to even see him from the way they talked. The baby was born August 1st. 08 so he got to spend a little time with him before he died Dec. 29, 08. He was diagnosed 2 weeks before his Son was born. I’ve lived my life he deserved more time.

With love, I say this. Jude, you alive. Live for both of you now. Your son still is the high of your life – that hasn’t changed. The survivor’s guilt you feel is all a part of the grief, and something you can’t help but feel. Feeling is the biggest part of being alive. Keep writing and feeling and being alive, dear Jude!
.-= Theresa´s last blog ..Generally? There’s No Such Thing =-.

Jude, I’m so sorry to hear about your son. I lost my best friend when we were both 23. He died suddenly of a heart defect. When I heard the news, I raced about 15 miles down the road to his house, screaming, “why him, why not me?”. I was convinced that it should have been me because he truly lived his short life like an angel and I had done so much that I had regretted.

His parents were quite famous and thought they would never perform again, but as time went by, they were eventually able to go on.

There is no question that losing a child is the greatest tragedy one can ever face.

One of our dear friends who just passed last year lived to be 98 and was one of the happiest people I had ever known. One of her sons was brutally murdered at an ATM many years ago. He was 42 at the time.

I mention these incidents to share that you are not alone. I think it is wonderful that you have opened this forum to be able to share your feelings and thoughts with the world. I think it is so important to honor your son by doing this, and in turn, I believe you will find the courage and the strength to be happy once again without having to feel guilt about it. I am sure that is what your son would have wanted, and you will be a pillar for your lovely grandson!

If you haven’t read it, “Happy for no Reason” by Marci Shimoff is a wonderful book that you may find helpful.

Wishing you the best of health and happiness going forward!!
.-= Ricky Powell´s last blog ..Aug 9, ten ways to fill up on happiness =-.

I tend to think that happiness is over-rated. Contentment is perfectly acceptable, with periods of crisis, anger, despair and all the other high-energy emotions. I am truly content with my life. Maybe that is happiness?
.-= Jan from BetterSpines´s last blog ..A ‘mock-up’ vaccine! =-.

Happiness is a choice. If you choose to be happy with what you have and how you are living then you will be. If you choose to be unhappy, so will you be also.

I also believe that your choice of happiness vs unhappiness depends on how greedy of a person you are. Some of us choose to be happy with the things we NEED in life, and though we do WANT other things.. not having everything you want shouldn’t be a reason to be unhappy. Some people are just miserable if they can’t have it all, and even then it’s not enough.
.-= angela´s last blog ..There Goes That Stupid Girl With The Long Brown Hair =-.

Jan, I would imagine being content would either mean your happy with your lot in life or you’ve learned to settle and accept and just be grateful. I’m grateful for the people in my life, plus I’m grateful for what I have however I notice that I don’t smile or even laugh out loud much.

Thank-you Ricky for your comforting words, I’ll check out Happy For No Reason. I have known many people that have lost children younger than mine and I really feel for them. I’m always grateful that he was in my life for as long as he was.

Thank-you Theresa, but I’m afraid Ethan will have to live for his Father because I’m tired. I read your one post awhile back about all the people around you that are suffering from cancer and how the one isn’t fighting for their life, that one would be me if ever I was afflicted. I’ve watched many a friend die from the cure and not enjoy their last months at all including my dear Son and he didn’t even get to enjoy his Son the 5 months he managed to hold on. I saw my Mother die at 7 and she was not afraid nor was my Father 6 months later. Looking back at my life I am grateful for all of the living experiences, but I do not really care if I have many more, I look at death as a friend, but I would never do anything to beckon that friend until it was my time.

Jude, are you still together with your son’s father? I am just curious because I believe it can be comforting to be in a loving relationship with someone who can help get you through these very trying times. In fact, tragedies like this can often lead to couples separating due to the event. I have heard of many instances of this happening.

However, when someone else comes into your life that you can love with all your heart, although they would never replace your loss (not should they try), they can perhaps help ease the pain enough to begin enjoying life again and help brighten your future.

Angela’s words above have been my motto for several years. I began i-choose-happiness.com over two years ago with the intention of helping people make the choice of happiness as often as they can. I plan on taking it to the next level by the first of the year, making it much more interactive by having dialogues such as this one which are SO important so that people who are suffering and living through the pain you feel right now can have support from others online and on the phone and be able to share your thoughts and feelings in order to ultimately know that you can make the choice to feel happiness again and help others do the same. Helping others is a biggie with overall happiness!
.-= Ricky´s last blog ..Aug 9, ten ways to fill up on happiness =-.

Ricky, that’s great that you stopped by here and have tried to help and I hope you can help many, but you can’t help me. As I keep repeating I am unipolar and I am a depressed low end level person never high and have basically been all my life. I did have some happiness when I took a drug that was a mood elevator, to bring me up to a certain point that a normal person would be. I am just not normal.bI am not and have never been with my Son’s Father to answer your question and my life has not been a normal life, but I have enjoyed certain times in my life. I don’t know what else to tell you.

I understand, Jude. I didn’t mean to pry. I’m glad I found your site and I do hope you will check out the book I mentioned. Hopefully, you can agree that it probably couldn’t hurt. Wishing you nothing but the best!
.-= Ricky´s last blog ..Aug 9, ten ways to fill up on happiness =-.

Ricky, I’m sorry I sounded like such a prick. It wasn’t prying on your part, I pretty much have my whole life in this blog. I really appreciated your desire to help and I actually do have enjoyable days I just seem to feel like there really isn’t a lasting happiness on Earth and like one of the commenters said , How could you appreciate the happiness that might come your way if you don’t have something to compare it with or something to that effect. I’m sure you will do great in helping and I really appreciate the time you have spent with me. I do have someone that loves me and has helped me tremendously I don’t know what I might have done without his support.

No worries, and no apology needed. You are going through a lot and I’m glad you have someone helping you to get through it. That’s very important… not to go it alone.
.-= Ricky´s last blog ..Aug 9, ten ways to fill up on happiness =-.