11
Jan

Cost Of Dying Could Give You A Heart Attack

   Posted by: jude8753   in Pappy and Nana

Years ago Bill bought and paid for his burial spot and a vault which is required here in PA. We were contacted to come in for a review which we did. Of course this was not one of our favorite things to do, but it was necessary. Bill was under the impression that everything was all set until she started going over everything and we realized that it was far from being a done deal.

Until she was done adding in all the opening and closing costs, casket, memorial and service costs it was close to 10,000 extra dollars, we were flabbergasted. She was suppose to send us all the paper work so we could review it and decide what we were going to do. So far we haven’t received anything to review and that’s been a few months ago. We were told we could make payments so everything would be in order.

No one really wants to think about the details of their death we just assume it will be taken care of.  Losing a loved one is hard and the grief that ensues from family members is bad enough, but to add a financial burden to our loved ones left behind and making arrangements that we should have made is cruel. Of course most people have life or burial insurance that will cover some if not all the expenses, but many don’t.

I am going to be cremated myself because I do not want to be planted in the ground regardless of how pretty the spot may be. I do not want a service before I’m cremated or any type of memorial afterwards. I have always cringed just thinking about someone gawking at me and saying stupid stuff like,” Look how happy and peaceful she looks now” or ” She looks really bad, poor thing.”

If they want to do anything I would prefer they all just go have a party and celebrate my life, not cry because I’m gone.  Bill knows what to do with my ashes, but I’m not sure  what he is going to decide now for himself. At any rate the whole point I was trying to make  is maybe you should check into the arrangements you may have made and find out if everything is actually paid for in full so it wont be a financial burden on those left behind, most of us tend to put these things off.

This entry was posted on Monday, January 11th, 2010 at 12:18 pm and is filed under Pappy and Nana. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

28 comments so far

 1 

Question, doesn’t Bill have Veteran Burial? Veterans can be buried at any Veteran cemetery and Most of the expenses are covered by the Military. I know there is some cost on the survivors part. But it shouldn’t be as much as they are asking. They cemeteries know how to reel one in. I think it’s a scam, if you ask me. Of course I have an internment officer living next door and I know he would not agree,lol. Oh that cremation is sounding better and better.
.-= Auntie E´s last blog ..Snow Around the World =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 1:05 pm
 2 

Question, doesn’t Bill have Veteran Burial? Veterans can be buried at any Veteran cemetery and Most of the expenses are covered by the Military. I know there is some cost on the survivors part. But it shouldn’t be as much as they are asking. They cemeteries know how to reel one in. I think it’s a scam, if you ask me. Of course I have an internment officer living next door and I know he would not agree,lol. Oh that cremation is sounding better and better.
.-= Auntie E´s last blog ..Snow Around the World =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 1:05 pm
jude
 3 

Hi Auntie E that cost also included me being buried in my urn with him which I do not want to happen, but he decided he didn’t want to be buried alone, lol he is now rethinking the whole burial thing. Yes he can have a military burial with cheaper additional costs and that we are going to review when she sends all the paper work and decide on the cheapest and best options that we can take care of without going into debt.

January 11th, 2010 at 1:35 pm
jude
 4 

Hi Auntie E that cost also included me being buried in my urn with him which I do not want to happen, but he decided he didn’t want to be buried alone, lol he is now rethinking the whole burial thing. Yes he can have a military burial with cheaper additional costs and that we are going to review when she sends all the paper work and decide on the cheapest and best options that we can take care of without going into debt.

January 11th, 2010 at 1:35 pm
 5 

After just burying grandma, I completely understand the sticker shock! Both my DH and I are on the side of cremation and so is our oldest, so even should something happen to both of us, she knows what we want. Now, my BIL lives on hundreds of acres and they are looking into creating a green cemetery there. You only pay for a large plot (8′x10′, I think) and let nature take it’s course.
.-= Anna´s last blog ..New Hair Cut =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 2:15 pm
 6 

After just burying grandma, I completely understand the sticker shock! Both my DH and I are on the side of cremation and so is our oldest, so even should something happen to both of us, she knows what we want. Now, my BIL lives on hundreds of acres and they are looking into creating a green cemetery there. You only pay for a large plot (8′x10′, I think) and let nature take it’s course.
.-= Anna´s last blog ..New Hair Cut =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 2:15 pm
 7 

My folks are buried in PA and prepaid for it. Well, most of it. My brother and sister finalized the details and payments, so I don’t know how much came out of the estate to pay at the end. It was really nice of them to do it. Made it so much easier on us at the time.
My wife and I want to be cremated and deep sixed. There is a place that put’s ashes in a concrete ‘reefball’ that is then sunk where it will help form a reef to marine life. We have the paper work made out but not prepaid yet.
We don’t want any other service either.
Thanks ,
GregoryJ
.-= GregoryJ´s last blog .."It’s Madness" Monday =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 3:46 pm
 8 

My folks are buried in PA and prepaid for it. Well, most of it. My brother and sister finalized the details and payments, so I don’t know how much came out of the estate to pay at the end. It was really nice of them to do it. Made it so much easier on us at the time.
My wife and I want to be cremated and deep sixed. There is a place that put’s ashes in a concrete ‘reefball’ that is then sunk where it will help form a reef to marine life. We have the paper work made out but not prepaid yet.
We don’t want any other service either.
Thanks ,
GregoryJ
.-= GregoryJ´s last blog .."It’s Madness" Monday =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 3:46 pm
 9 

Both my grandparents had their plots paid for and their caskets picked out with money in an account to cover the headstone engraving, caskets and all the related costs. I always thought it was morbid as a kid how they were so well planned for death, but they just viewed it as an inevitable part of life. (and of course I had no comprehension of how expensive a burial was at that stage of my life.)

I guess I’d be cremated, I don’t like the idea of being in the ground. My husband likes the idea of a traditional Irish wake with friends bringing his body from bar to bar.
.-= Tina T´s last blog ..Can Technology Enhance Your Relationships? =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 6:10 pm
 10 

Both my grandparents had their plots paid for and their caskets picked out with money in an account to cover the headstone engraving, caskets and all the related costs. I always thought it was morbid as a kid how they were so well planned for death, but they just viewed it as an inevitable part of life. (and of course I had no comprehension of how expensive a burial was at that stage of my life.)

I guess I’d be cremated, I don’t like the idea of being in the ground. My husband likes the idea of a traditional Irish wake with friends bringing his body from bar to bar.
.-= Tina T´s last blog ..Can Technology Enhance Your Relationships? =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 6:10 pm
 11 

i am with you. i told my kids that i want to be cremated also and i want them to plant a weeping willow tree with my ashes in a place where they will always be able to go when they want to feel close to me. it’s ridiculous how much a casket cost and pointless to me.

have a great day…hugz!
.-= PJ´s last blog ..Smart Ass! =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 7:23 pm
 12 

i am with you. i told my kids that i want to be cremated also and i want them to plant a weeping willow tree with my ashes in a place where they will always be able to go when they want to feel close to me. it’s ridiculous how much a casket cost and pointless to me.

have a great day…hugz!
.-= PJ´s last blog ..Smart Ass! =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 7:23 pm
 13 

Over here where the land is scarce. Most people I know had been cremated. So I am more towards that too. Couldn’t imagine otherwise.

January 11th, 2010 at 9:38 pm
 14 

Over here where the land is scarce. Most people I know had been cremated. So I am more towards that too. Couldn’t imagine otherwise.

January 11th, 2010 at 9:38 pm
 15 

I think I like the idea of cremation too. I’ve often thought it would be much easier and inexpensive than the normal alternative.
.-= Ratty´s last blog ..Wintery Black Squirrel =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 10:03 pm
 16 

I think I like the idea of cremation too. I’ve often thought it would be much easier and inexpensive than the normal alternative.
.-= Ratty´s last blog ..Wintery Black Squirrel =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 10:03 pm
 17 

Hubby and I are also considering cremation. It’s crazy how much it costs these days!

Thanks for commenting at my ProBlogger post. If you have any questions, just let me know. I always appreciate your comments.
.-= Lynn´s last blog ..Getting Serious About Blogging =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 10:10 pm
 18 

Hubby and I are also considering cremation. It’s crazy how much it costs these days!

Thanks for commenting at my ProBlogger post. If you have any questions, just let me know. I always appreciate your comments.
.-= Lynn´s last blog ..Getting Serious About Blogging =-.

January 11th, 2010 at 10:10 pm
 19 

Yep, I’m with you Jude, cremation and a nice service–no viewing. I want a hot little photo of me the way folks remember me and then sprinkle my ashes at my favorite vacation spot. Cheap, easy and no frills.
.-= Lin´s last blog ..Commencing the Dork Off II =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 12:08 am
 20 

Yep, I’m with you Jude, cremation and a nice service–no viewing. I want a hot little photo of me the way folks remember me and then sprinkle my ashes at my favorite vacation spot. Cheap, easy and no frills.
.-= Lin´s last blog ..Commencing the Dork Off II =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 12:08 am
 21 

It’s scary how expensive it is! We were given two plots as a wedding gift, but they are in a different state now so who knows if we will even use them. I don’t even want to think about the costs involved!
.-= Storm´s last blog ..Fortune Cookie Says… =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 1:17 am
 22 

It’s scary how expensive it is! We were given two plots as a wedding gift, but they are in a different state now so who knows if we will even use them. I don’t even want to think about the costs involved!
.-= Storm´s last blog ..Fortune Cookie Says… =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 1:17 am
 23 

You should definitely look into the Vet. cemetery. My Dad was retired AF and he is buried in the VA cemetery just outside of Seattle. It is beautiful and the service was amazing, he would’ve been proud.
.-= Lynne´s last blog ..Entrecard and Viruses =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 3:17 pm
 24 

You should definitely look into the Vet. cemetery. My Dad was retired AF and he is buried in the VA cemetery just outside of Seattle. It is beautiful and the service was amazing, he would’ve been proud.
.-= Lynne´s last blog ..Entrecard and Viruses =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 3:17 pm
jude
 25 

When Bill got out of Vietnam he decided he wouldn’t use anything provided by the government even though he was entitled that’s why he bought his own plot and vault, but he may change his mind now. He was very disillusioned with the treatment they received. As far as I’m concerned they owe him a lot and he’s never asked for anything.

January 12th, 2010 at 3:43 pm
jude
 26 

When Bill got out of Vietnam he decided he wouldn’t use anything provided by the government even though he was entitled that’s why he bought his own plot and vault, but he may change his mind now. He was very disillusioned with the treatment they received. As far as I’m concerned they owe him a lot and he’s never asked for anything.

January 12th, 2010 at 3:43 pm
 27 

Lately my mom has been wanting to discuss hers and dad’s wishes and plans. It’s tough for my sister and I to discuss but we do need to be aware.
.-= Buggys´s last blog ..2010 Census Cautions =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 4:45 pm
 28 

Lately my mom has been wanting to discuss hers and dad’s wishes and plans. It’s tough for my sister and I to discuss but we do need to be aware.
.-= Buggys´s last blog ..2010 Census Cautions =-.

January 12th, 2010 at 4:45 pm

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