We love our families and try to be there for them when they need help because that’s what family is all about, but do you ever feel like your being taken advantage of even if your not. Do you do things even though you don’t feel like it and then feel like you’ve been put upon even though you agreed to help? Some people just really have a hard time saying no to anything because they don’t want someone to get mad at them or upset and everyone needs someone they know they can depend on. 

That brings me to the man I share my life with, Bill went over this past weekend to “help” my brother put up a drop ceiling. The operative word here was suppose to be help, Bill ended up doing it while my brother kept him company, but according to Bill he did hand him things every once in awhile and he tells me that he and Cecil make a great team so I just laugh. I’m glad my brother likes Bill, but he has 2 “young” son-in-laws doing nothing that could have done it. Bill works very hard during the week so he needs those 2 days to unwind not do extra work.

Don’t get me wrong I love my brother and see nothing wrong with helping, but sometimes family do sort of take advantage of a good thing, but only if we let them. I really don’t like the idea that Bill may feel obliged to help just because it’s my brother, he assures me that Cecil is his buddy so he doesn’t mind, but it bothers me because I don’t want my family to take advantage of his good nature. I’m just glad it was a rainy Saturday so we couldn’t go riding. I of course really don’t have a problem saying no to something I don’t want to do.

Bill is the sweetest most generous man I have ever met, yes this is a testimonial, in my lifetime. I never try to tell him what to do and he gives me the same respect, he doesn’t like tension or friction and has the tendency to give away things if someone admires something, so long as it’s his choice then that’s fine with me, but I don’t want to hear regret later which has happened a couple of times. Like the Pontiac we had and my brother wanted it so much.

Bill had absolutely no reason to sell that car because he loved it and it was cheap on gas, but my brother was always after it and Bill said if he ever sold it that it would be to him. I guess after several years he felt sorry for Cecil and when my brother offered him what I thought was a fair price and asked me what I thought I told him it was up to him that I wasn’t involved and not only did Bill sell it to him, but he even lowered the purchase price.

Okay, I’m done with my family rant now since Bill doesn’t want me to say anything to my family I needed to get it off my chest, but I’m quite sure in the future when my family asks Bill to “help” with anything I will be right there to make sure that’s all he does and since it’s my family I can say no easier than Bill although I’ve noticed he can say no easier to his family than mine, see that’s what I meant about him feeling obligated because of me.

I have been meaning to do this for quite some time and I always seem to get sidetracked. I need to add these awards because it actually is an honour to know people care. I’m not good at choosing other blogs because I don’t know who already has them and there’s so many great blogs out there that I like.

The Million Dollar Friend Award comes from 2 different sources who I’m sure you will want to visit because they both have great blogs and they are Speedcat Hollydale of 0007 Undercover TagMeAward Cat and  Annie of A Nice Place In The Sun the original givers are listed in a paragraph below explaining what the award is about.

“You are never a burden.. don’t ever think that. Friends need each other to pick them up when they are down and I would do nothing less. “Dawn Drover~ Twisted SisterA Million Dollar Friend is the kind of person who instinctively knows what it means to be a good friend; this kind of person makes you look forward to the days ahead and fondly remember the days that have passed. A Nice Place In The Sun

Lea of Ocean Of Perspectives gave me the Uber Amazing Blog Award and I really appreciate it because I really enjoy reading her insights about dealing with life and I’m sure you will too.

Uber Amazing Blog Award is a blog award given to sites who:
~ inspires you
~ makes you smile and laugh
~ or maybe gives amazing information
~ a great read
~ has an amazing design
~ and any other reasons you can think of that makes them uber amazing!

Crystal from Smoothie’s Place is a wahm who also home schools her children gave me the I Love Your Blog Award and I really appreciate her thoughfulness.

I am quite sure that Cindi of Moomettesgram gave me something, but I can’t for the life of me find it now, but I wanted to make sure that I thank her for it by adding her link here I know I meant to do all of this before, but with events happening as they did it kind of slipped my mind.

As you can see in the sideboard I have added the Pink Sisterhood logo because it was passed to me by Lala of Coastal Commentaries and it’s for a very good cause. For every click three mammograms will be funded for people in need because not everyone can afford mammograms, it’s free and only takes a second of your time.

I don’t think I’m a prude, but maybe I am about some things, I have always been modest as far as being able to undress in front of anyone even when I was young going to school. I have never been able to walk around nude in front of anyone so the thought of ever joining a nudist colony or going to a nude beach cracks me up although it doesn’t bother me to see other people nude. I don’t recall ever seeing my Mother or Father nude or even in the same bed except once.

When I was small my Mother slept with me and my daddy had his own room because he was sick so I didn’t understand that mommy and daddy’s slept together. One night I woke up and searched all over the house for my mom and the last place I looked was the ogre’s room because that’s how I thought of him because he was mean. I remember cracking the door and asking if my mommy was in there and she was so I went to the bed and took her hand and told her to come back to bed.

Of course at that age of my life I had no clue what they were doing, I just thought it strange that she was in his bed and not ours. I don’t recall ever seeing much affection between them or even any from him to his children. He was more prone to throw things because he was paralyzed and miserable and he would always shout and rant. I can see how I may have been preconditioned to think some of the things I do now. When I remember some of those things it makes me sad because she was only 45 when she died.

Older people do have sex it’s a simple fact of life and can actually occur until they both lose interest, but young people avoid thinking of their parents as sexual beings and think it’s gross for old people to grope (Slang To handle or fondle for sexual pleasure) and we as parents definitely don’t want to see our children doing it. I actually think all groping in public is gross whether they are young or old some things are just meant to be private. There is no way I would ever lay a lip lock on Bill in front of anyone.

I see nothing wrong with holding hands or an arm around the shoulder or even a peck on the cheek, but some of the public displays I’ve seen in the past years on public streets and parks are down right disgusting. Public displays between gay or lesbian partners are also on the rise and even though most people are blasé about it there is still a sense of taboo and most people even though tolerant really don’t want their children seeing it. 

Live and let live, what people do in the privacy of their home bothers me not, but when it becomes a public display then I get uncomfortable, so maybe I am a public display groping prude.

When I was 10 years old I copied the quote I have listed below from Socrates’ Apology into the back of my bible and it has always helped me. I don’t even remember where I found the quote way back then, but it simply made sense to me then and even now. I don’t fear dying for myself or for my son I simply don’t want him to go before I do.

I sincerely thank all of you for the support and prayers they have been much appreciated. I apologise for my hateful post last might, but it made me feel better just putting the words out there in the universe. No one likes to think about dying, but most of us have had to face it at various times in our lives with friends and loved ones and the tragedies that occur.

 ‘To fear death, gentlemen, is no other than to think oneself wise when one is not, to think one knows what one does not know. No one knows whether death may not be the greatest of all blessings for a man, yet men fear it as if they knew that it is the greatest of evils. And surely it is the most blameworthy ignorance to believe that one knows what one does not know.’

I have talked about death many times in the past I guess because I seem to have seen a lot of it. I am dealing with this present situation very well under the circumstances and now I am determined to stop grieving for what could have been and simply remember that I sometimes got to share some happy experiences with another living soul who just happens to be my son.