I’ll take a stab at getting back into some sort of online routine today, but I’m finding it difficult to concentrate after my hiatus. I realized recently that I’ve been letting real life take a back seat to my virtual world and that’s not good, I needed time to reflect and sort a few things out. Can’t say I really got anything sorted though, but I did realize there are more important things to do than spend so many hours on the computer. I guess everyone needs a break from time to time.

Bill was off work for 10 days and as much as I love him I think I will probably go nuts when he retires and he probably will also. Everyone needs some kind of structure and since he’s worked all his life he dreams of retiring and not dealing with so much work pressure. However with these past 10 days I think he realized how bored he will be when that time does come. He didn’t know what to do with himself or his time unless we were riding the bike and spending time together.

It’s okay when you go away and sight see and we had planned to go to Ocean City, but decided we could use that money in other ways.  It doesn’t matter how much you love someone you need time to yourself, you cannot spend every waking minute together because sooner or later you may wont to rip your hair out. I wish he would and could retire, but now I’m stressed and worried that he will and I wont know how to make him happy. Of course I shouldn’t feel like it’s my responsibility to keep him from getting bored, but I do.

Okay enough of the retirement, we took his Son and family to breakfast Saturday and received news which really didn’t surprise us, they are expecting a new baby in Feb. They seem really happy and I hope this one will be a boy because they have two little girls, one almost 4 and the other 2 and they really want a boy this time, but will of course be just as happy with another girl. Also my Grandson Ethan will be coming up from Kentucky next week and I’m beside myself with excitement.

That’s enough for today and I’m happy to be back, but I will start spending less time online than before. Have a great day.

I hate to shop so it’s a good thing Bill does it. He always makes a list and uses coupons when he remembers to give them to the cashier, usually he forgets unless I’m there to remind him. He has his favorite store which everyone calls the ghetto Giant because he’s always shopped there and knows his way around. They built a brand new one about 2 miles from our house, but he hates it even though they have a better deli and better selection of meat and seafood and salad bar plus everything the other one doesn’t.

Most of us are creatures of habit and don’t really like change, he’s been working the same job for over forty years, but it’s really stressing him out the past few years and he’s really looking forward to retirement. Last week he told me he was definitely going to retire when he turns 62 in December and I said great, but now he’s afraid we can’t survive on Social Security and his company doesn’t have a retirement package. He makes more in one week than he will draw for the whole month when he retires.

I personally would rather see him unstressed without much money than stressed and sick with money to spend when he feels like it. Which brings me back to shopping, every Sunday he makes his trip to the store and always spends at least 80 dollars and sometimes more which amazes me because there’s not much there when he brings it home plus the bonus card always knocks the prices down and they always have the buy one get one free on certain items plus for every 100 you spend you get money off their gas prices.

Usually we end up getting 50 cents off a gallon and since gas prices have gone back up over two dollars that’s a big savings. Most people are on a budget and so are we, but when he retires it will be even more strict. Bill’s favorite food is a pot of beans, potatoes and greens with corn bread and since we both grew up in the south that was more or less a staple for us poor folks. We were talking about what we would want for our last meal and of course he said beans for myself I will have a 2 inch steak cooked Pittsburgh rare, burnt on the outside and rare in the center.

I usually cook him a pot of pinto beans every week or every other and today is his bean day and he will eat them till he feels miserable. My brother is strange because without me telling him which week or day I’m cooking beans he always shows up on that day because he loves beans just like Bill and I think he must smell them from 10 blocks away it’s uncanny. This morning he called to ask when I’d cut his hair and I told him Thursday so he then asked me what I was doing and I said cooking and of course he wanted to know what, needless to say he’ll be here at 4 to eat.

Since the big talk these days is all about red meat killing you if I’m gonna die anyways then I’ll go after I eat my red meat. Of course when retirement gets here I can see that we will be eating a lot of beans and potatoes which is fine and I’ll probably make a garden and learn to can food. I seldom ever buy new clothes I prefer thrift stores and consignment shops because I’m frugal and besides you can find good clothes for half the price, big deal I’m not too proud I just make sure I wash them good. I’m not that fond of beans, but I’ll survive on anything if Bill is happier. I guess I better start stocking up on Beano.

When I started this blog I put it in the mixed bag category then changed it to women’s interest because I’m quite sure men really don’t care what I blog about. Of course there are several other categories that I could list it, but I really don’t think it matters. If they had a senior lifestyle I would probably list it there, because many older couples are deciding to live together without that legal piece of paper because of economical and other reasons. We had planned on getting married 6 years ago, but for various reasons have decided against it for now.

Older people have many worries just like everyone else. We worry if we’ll be able to survive when retirement comes, will there be enough money, will Social Security benefits be there for those of us that worked all our lives, but at menial jobs that have no retirement benefits and had to live from week to week. Health is a big issue for us of course because for those that didn’t practise healthy living we tend to start falling apart and even if we did practise healthy living habits various illnesses still seem to befall us.

I always hate to read the obits because my friends seem to be dying left and right, Bill on the other hand does read it and keeps me informed. Depression seems to run rampant amongst many older seniors that aren’t active or have something to look forward to. I’ve mentioned before that other than Bill’s keen interest in motorcycles and riding I’m not sure how he will fill his leisure time and he worries about not being able to ride, that’s his biggest fear so we’ve been considering a trike. I know I would feel much safer on 3 wheels.

What happens when we get too old to drive and can barely walk, are we forgotten and discarded because we have become a burden? Not all families are loving and helpful to their parents or elders, but some do try to take care of them and it does get very stressful for all concerned. At some point inevitably the nursing home option comes into play, I do not want to go to a nursing home I’d rather be dead. If anything ever happens to Bill I will be totally alone and very lonely, but there will be no other man in my life for companionship or otherwise.

Bill has told his children that if he goes before me he wants me to live here till I die and I’m quite sure that wouldn’t be very long without him. If he doesn’t make that will before something happens I could very well find myself out on the street which is something else that bothers me. When we are young we tend to live for the moment and put old age on the back burner, but it creeps up before you know it. I could probably live on the street, but I’m not sure how long I would survive and still I wouldn’t want to go to a nursing home.

I don’t fight with my wrinkles any more nor do I try to cover my silver and that’s the best part of aging for me and I know Bill will never trade me in for a younger model or at least I hope not. Okay enough of my old age rambling for today I hope I didn’t depress anyone, it’s time to go out and enjoy the sunshine and push those gloomy thoughts away. Since we are living longer I think I’ll do like I did when I was young and start worrying about all that crap when I’m in my 80′s, God willing and the body isn’t worn out by then.

Aging is inevitable it starts the minute we are born and as we grow we are taught about healthy aging and what we can do to stay healthy by eating right and exercising so we are prepared to love and embrace life to the fullest. We are taught these things, but we don’t always follow through, that of course is why we have so many diets floating around and obese people in our country. With all the stress people endure during their life time we seem to find unhealthy choices to help us cope instead.

Is there really such a thing as aging gracefully and still being able to love life with retirement in view? I know many people start to feel like their usefulness and productive days are now over. It doesn’t have to be a scary transition and even though they may think that this has always been their dream of having the permanent vacation it seems we start worrying about ill health and other aspects of aging. We dream of doing as we please provided the money aspect has been planned for this time period.

Many people find that they don’t like being retired as much as they thought they would and go out and do volunteer work or even get part time jobs. Some older people actually go back to school which is great especially if it’s something they have always dreamed about and can now afford, but just never had the time. There are many adult classes that you can take at your local high school even, learn about computers, take an art appreciation course and learn to paint among a few that are offered.

I’ve been retired for a few years now because Bill gave me that opportunity and personally I love it even though I don’t have the money I had when I worked. I mentioned before that I have been thinking about opening a beauty shop only because I don’t feel productive and at times I feel useless and even start to wonder what good I am. Depression can run rampant among the elderly because we sometimes experience mild impairment of thinking and memory and we’re no longer able to do the things that we were able to do before.

Some of the symptoms of depression for older adults are an expressed feeling of being unworthy and being a bother or a burden, withdrawal from social activities and any decreased activity with no apparent physical cause, loss of interest and pleasure in things we previously enjoyed, loss of weight, loss of appetite, and restlessness. Of course these signs can be seen in any age group not just the elderly so even if someone you know is young and showing these signs you should be alert to them and see how you can help, seek advice from a professional. 

Anyone can benefit from being around family and friends who can give security and support and that isn’t exclusive to just the older generation everyone young or old needs this, but often times don’t find it in time. We all want to achieve healthy aging and to be happy and embrace life, it is important to have close relationships with others and participate in regular activities that give meaning and excitement to life. Many things as I’ve mentioned include volunteering, visiting friends, maintaining some form of physical activity and even going back to school, with me learning to ride a bike.