I really dislike being in the state of mind that seems to be overpowering me at the moment. I seem to be suspended somewhere outside myself, I can’t seem to make a connection to what I’m thinking or feeling so I am in limbo or so it feels. My body functions from day to day and I get through each one as it arises, but nothing really makes sense. Yes, I know it’s some form of depression, but for the moment I seem without power to help myself and sometimes I just don’t care.

I’m always amazed when I wake up and see that I’m still in the same body with the same familiar surroundings. Everyone seeks for the purpose and meaning of their life, many fulfill themselves through religion and God, others find truth in helping their fellow man and the reality of the earth they see before them by striving to save the planet. Many just seem to drift seeking, but never really finding, flitting from one illusion to another.

I think it’s great that each day brings choices and decisions that we must make that will affect our future life and even those around us. We have the power to make anything possible when we believe and what happens when we no longer believe or have hope of effecting a positive change? I don’t think I would ever commit suicide because I don’t understand the concept of ending it all, I don’t think anything is ever ended, I think that source of energy simply returns to the original source and is recycled into another channel.

Today I don’t know what I think or feel or even believe so I feel like I’m in limbo and I don’t like it, perhaps tomorrow I’ll snap out of it.

Bill’s Laser Iridotomy didn’t work, the pressure is still way too high, so in July the doctor is going to try something else. He told Bill that he wasn’t going to let him lose his sight. I don’t really think that’s something you can make a promise about, but he was trying to be reassuring. He sounds like he wants to try several different things before they do actual eye surgery.

He gave us a print out which I posted below for those that have glaucoma that might be facing this same type of surgery down the road. We hope it wont come to that, but you do what you have to. Have a great weekend.

Trabeculectomy & Sclerostomy  Filtering Microsurgery

What is filtering microsurgery? In glaucoma, the eye’s inner fluid pressure can build up and damage the optic nerve, the nerve that carries visual pictures to the brain. Damage to the optic nerve can lead to vision loss. When medicines and laser surgeries do not lower pressure enough, eye doctors may recommend a procedure called filtering microsurgery (sometimes called conventional or cutting surgery).

In filtering microsurgery, a tiny drainage hole is made in the sclera (the white part of the eye) in a procedure called a trabeculectomy or a sclerostomy. The new drainage hole allows fluid to flow out of the eye and helps lower the eye pressure. This prevents or reduces damage to the optic nerve.

How does the eye doctor determine if filtering surgery is needed? Often, laser surgery is recommended before filtering microsurgery, unless the eye pressure is very high or the optic nerve is badly damaged. During laser surgery, a tiny but powerful beam of light is used to make several small scars in the eye’s trabecular meshwork (the eye’s drainage system). The scars will help increase the flow of fluid out of the eye.

When laser surgery does not successfully lower eye pressure or the pressure lowering effects wear off, the doctor may recommend filtering rmcrosurgery . Is there pain during microsurgery? In most cases, there is no pain involved. The surgery is usually done with a local anesthetic and relaxing medications. Often a limited type of anesthesia, called intravenous (LV.) sedation, is used.

In addition, an injection is given around or behind the eye to prevent eye movement. This injection is not painful when LV. sedation is used first. The patient will be relaxed and drowsy and will not experience any pain during surgery. What is the success rate? Most of the related studies document follow-up for a one year period. In those reports, it shows that in older patients, glaucoma filtering surgery is successful in about 70-90% of cases, for at least one year.

Occasionally, the surgically-created drainage hole begins to close and the pressure rises again. This happens because the body tries to heal the new opening in the eye, as if the opening were an injury. This rapid healing occurs most often in younger people, because they have a stronger healing system. Anti-wound healing drugs, such as mitomycin-C and 5-FU help slow down the healing of the opening. If needed, glaucoma filtering surgery can be done a number of times in the same eye.

Is this an outpatient procedure or is an overnight stay in the hospital needed? Usually, filtering surgery is an outpatient procedure, requiring no overnight hospital stay. Within a few days after surgery, the eye doctor will need to check on the eye pressure. The doctor will also look for any signs of infection or increase in inflammation.

How long is the recovery time? For at least one week after surgery, patients are advised to keep water out of the eye. Most daily activities can be done, however, it is important to avoid driving, reading, bending, and doing any heavy lifting. Since each case is different, patients should check with their doctor for
specific advice.

How will the eye look after surgery? Is there a noticeable scar or redness? The eye will be red and irritated shortly after surgery, and there may be increased eye tearing or watering. The inner eye fluid flows through the surgically-created hole and forms a small blister-like bump called a bleb. The bleb, usually located on the upper surface of the eye, is covered by the eyelid, and is usually not visible.

Will vision be changed? Will glaucoma medications still need to be taken? There may be some vision changes, such as blurred vision, for about six weeks after the surgery. After that time, vision will usually return to the same level it was before surgery. Vision can sometimes improve after surgery in people who were previously using pilocarpine.

When pilocarpine drops are no longer taken, the pupil returns to normal size, allowing more light to enter the eye. In a few cases, the vision may be worse due to very low pressure. Cataracts or wrinkle in the macula area of the eye may develop. In terms of vision correction, a patient’s glasses or contact lenses may need to be changed after surgery.

Both gas permeable and soft contact lenses may be worn after glaucoma filtering surgery. There may be fitting problems due to the bleb. Special care is needed to avoid infection of the bleb. Contact lens users should discuss these problems with their eye doctor following surgery.

The Glaucoma Research Foundation acknowledges with appreciation Eve Higginbotham, MO, for her contributions to this information sheet. 490 Post Street, Suite 1427 • San Francisco, CA 94102 Telephone 415.986.3162 • Fax 415.986.3763 • www.glaucoma.org

Parentgiving is a great site for anyone that is taking care of an aging parent you’ll find a lot of useful information that furnishes caregiver resources and news. They even have care managers that you can call if you are having any problems that you can’t handle and consult with them, these are registered nurses and social workers. It’s not easy being a caregiver especially when you are already stressed with taking care of your own family and then when something happens to an aging parent you’re faced with some hard decisions that you may need help with.

It’s hard to think that we’ll ever get old when we are young, but it does gradually start sinking in and we face each passing year with a growing dread over certain phases that we know we will go through eventually. That’s why so many are eating healthier and making better choices because we’re living much longer now. I sometimes think about losing my memories and the devastating effect that would have on family members and what it would be like to forget everybody and everything.

I’m thinking we might have to move eventually because of our stairs, sometimes it’s hard getting up and down them and the bathroom of course is on the second floor. I know I’ve started using my bathroom handrails more often now also. We already have the higher toilet and it’s so weird when we visit family and they have those standard sized ones that look like they’re for a child. My brother loved mine so much that he had to get himself one. Believe me it’s so much easier on your back and I love mine. I know we’ll have to add more safety features the older we get.

We babysat the little 10 month old tonight and I thought how helpless this little baby was while I was changing her diaper and started thinking about how we come in the world helpless and many of us go out the same way. I know as I grow older there are many things that I dread and one of those for me will be if I ever get to the point that I would have to wear adult diapers don’t get me wrong they are a godsend for many adults that suffer from incontinence, but it’s just not something I’m looking forward to. At any rate be sure to check out the caregiver learning center.

Lately I have been researching the PH level in the body and how to maintain the required balance our body needs in order to be healthy and fight off disease. The pH level scale runs from 1 to 14 with 1 serving as “very acidic” 7 being “neutral” and 14 being “very alkaline”. Our bloodstream goes to great lengths to maintain a pH level of 7.35 to 7.45. Finding a balance of 70% alkaline and 30% acid foods seems to be the key. This means that you can still enjoy the foods that you love as long as they are balanced by alkalizing foods.

You can’t alkalize your body if you continue to drink or eat high sugar drinks and fruits. Sugar is  one of the most acidic things you can put into your body. The more acidic a body becomes, the more fat the body will store. Overweight conditions result from too much acid in the body and for those of us that drink alcohol you should know this will definitely disrupt the pH of your system.

It pains me that coffee, soda and teas are also a no no. The best beverage to drink for alkalizing is ionized water, but I can’t afford one of those ionizing systems. Also starchy foods like potatoes, pasta and breads all break down to sugar, and then produce acid waste that collects in the body. Eating any of the animal proteins (chicken, beef, pork, lamb etc) will create excess acid waste in your body as well. Dairy products have concentrated sugars that break down into lactic acid, which creates acidic waste.

So many things that I have a habit of eating and love just isn’t good for me and my body or yours, but it’s your choice. There are so many diet plans out there and so many people swearing by their particular one, but keeping your bodily ph balanced just makes the most sense to me. I’m sure anything in moderation would be okay, but I tend to go over board with the foods and drinks I like, however I do intend to start using more alkalized fruits and vegetables in my daily life I need the energy and I’m tired of feeling sick.

Learning which foods and supplements that add alkaline to your pH levels is just the beginning and many items are listed below, but we need to learn how to Implement them. After adding these healing foods to our diet we can test our body’s pH levels with a  saliva strip test available at most health food stores. Keeping your pH level between 7 and 8 is the target for good health and bringing your bodily pH back to normal  will give us relief from a variety of symptoms.

Most people eat a lot of acidic foods like animal protein, dairy products and wheat. Many health problems are due to excess acidity in the body like chronic fatigue, excess mucous production, nasal congestion, frequent colds and infections, stress, anxiety, weak nails, dry hair, dry skin, headaches, arthritis, muscle pain, hives and leg cramps are all signs of excess acidity and I am prone to most of these lately.

You can simply and easily infuse your body with alkaline foods by using green drinks one to three times per day you can buy it in powder form at health food stores. Green drinks are made from grasses, sprouted grains and other green vegetables. These will help your body become more alkaline and they have the vitamins, minerals and amino acids that your body needs to repair itself, anything we can do to reduce the acidic state  will help our organs to function properly.

Minerals that have an alkalizing effect on the body are: cesium, potassium, sodium, calcium, and magnesium. Minerals are essential to optimum health so by paying attention to which minerals have alkalizing effects can add the proper balance to your blood pH. All protein derived from animals is acidic. Proteins that are alkaline are: almonds, chestnuts, millet, tempeh, tofu, and whey protein powder.

Kamut grass can decrease cholesterol levels, help with weight loss and add protein to the diet. Broccoli is a strong anti-cancer food and it also helps boost the immune system and improve digestion. Dandelion greens help with weight loss and cholesterol levels. They are also a good source of iron and calcium. Kale contains vitamin C, A, Iron, Calcium, Potassium and Magnesium. Alfalfa sprouts can help redistribute your body weight after you lose weight. So by using green drinks you can help boost the alkaline level.

Vegetables that are alkalizing are: alfalfa, barley grass, beets, beet greens, broccoli, cabbage, carrot, cauliflower, celery, chard greens, collard greens, cucumber, dandelions, eggplant, garlic, green beans, green peas, kale, kohlrabi, lettuce, mushrooms, mustard greens, nightshade veggies, onions, parsnips, peas, peppers, pumpkin, radishes, rutabaga, sea veggies, spinach, sprouts, sweet potatoes, tomatoes, watercress, wheat grass, and wild greens.

Fruits that have an alkalizing effect are: apples, apricots, avocados, bananas, berries, blackberries, cantaloupe, cherries, coconut, currants, dates, figs, grapes, grapefruit, honeydew, lemons, limes, muskmelons, nectarines, oranges, peaches, pears, pineapple, raisins, raspberries, rhubarb, strawberries, tangerines, tomatoes, tropical fruits, and watermelon.

Alkalizing condiments are: cinnamon, curry, ginger, mustard, chili pepper, sea salt, stevia, miso, tamari, and all herbs. Other ways to add alkaline to your diet are: apple cider vinegar, alkaline antioxidant water, bee pollen, lecithin granules, molasses, probiotic cultures, soured dairy products, green juices, veggie juices, fresh fruit juice, and mineral water.